From a Buick 8 by Stephen King and an alien rant

I just finished reading this book and I have to write about it while it’s fresh in my mind. Two things first: A) I don’t usually read horrors/thrillers/mystery because I am a giant wuss and I get nightmares when I read them B) but I decided to be brave and read it anyway.

Here’s a dumbed down synopsis of the plot: An old Buick got abandoned a gas station and was brought to a police station. Since then, it has been taken care by the officers for like…thirty years without the public knowing about it because it turns out (DRUMROLL PLEASE) it’s not just any ordinary car: it happened to be a linkway between Earth and an alien planet. The officers (Troopers, they are called in the book) kept it a secret because they believed it is their duty to protect the people and also because the main guys who found it wanted to study it for themselves. The annoying thing about the Buick is that it kept spitting out all these alien bats and leaves and an actual E.T that was immediately chowed down by the police dog. (It later got poisoned by the fluids from the same ET and died.) And yeah. That pretty much is it.

Of course, Stephen King told it in a much scarier way because he’s Stephen King and everything he does is scary…even his name scares me sometimes. But I’m not as freaked out by this book as I was by his other ones (like The Shining or Carrie) because one main thing: ALIENS.

I get why people are obsessed with them, I really do. And I think they exists. And I think they’ve been to Earth.

No, I’m serious.

I think they’ve been to Earth, we just don’t know it yet because I’m pretty sure they just turned around and left after like, two days. Think about it. We’re not entirely that interesting. Sometimes we give ourselves too much credit (I blame Hollywood for that) by thinking that everyone wants to live in Planet Earth because it can ‘sustain life’. But what if ‘sustenance’ doesn’t actually mean oxygen or trees or pizza? I’m sure aliens have their own way of surviving and they are perfectly fine with their lives and have no intention of bunking in with us. Aliens doesn’t always have to be synonymous with ‘OH MY GOD, THEY’RE GOING TO GET US! THEY WANT TO TAKE OVER THE PLANET AND EAT US AND MAKE US THEIR SLAVES! QUICK, GET TOM CRUISE AND JAMES CAMERON AND SIGOURNEY WEAVER WE NEED TO SAVE AMERICA….AND THE REST OF THE WORLD TOO, IF WE HAVE TIME!’

Get off your high horses, homo sapiens, we’re not that big of a deal. Yesterday, I saw my mother tried to use a phone upside down and my colleague walked into a door. Do you really think these are the species aliens would want to control? Didn’t think so.